I might not be considered the most logical person, especially in how I move through the world and make my decisions, but I trust what I know, and I know spirit. The first time this idea became a concrete reality was when I was nine years old, and my grade four teacher assigned me the yellow spotted salamander as my topic of study for a rudimentary science project. Even then, Ms. Nobel was extremely calm and way ahead of her time. I remember her collecting compost back in the mid-90s, and instilled the importance of recycling and being kind to the earth at an early age; I appreciated my time in her classroom.

I had never seen a salamander before I was given this project topic, but excitedly, I thought I would find one. I was always exploring the woods alone with my cat Sam. So, one afternoon, I went out into the woods and purposely looked for one. I went to my favourite area, closer to my neighbor’s house, and went to a clearing.

I had been out for a while looking but eventually gave up my search, and I had just passed by one of the ponds when I decided to turn back around and head home for the day. Only about 30 seconds had passed, but when I turned around and looked down, I noticed a yellow spotted salamander on a rock partially submerged. It looked as though it had been placed there for me. I was startled, and I remember staring at it because I was shocked and confused. How had it appeared so quickly—as if someone had left it there as a gift?

I rushed home and forced my mom to come back with me into the woods because I wasn’t sure if it was dead, and I didn’t want to move it alone, but I still brought it home regardless, even though it had died, and it decomposed in the bathroom for a few days before I gave it a proper burial in the garden underneath a plum tree.

It was one of those moments that always stuck out to me and still does. The concept, “ask so you shall receive,” hit home and was one of those things that I never really understood and maybe don’t fully understand even today. I knew something was at spiritually significant work, and it felt like pure magic in the most absolute sense. Many years later, I connected a lot to hawk medicine because I felt drawn to that animal’s wisdom, and I requested a feather from the universe from an animal itself.

Within days of my request, I found a hawk that had just been struck along the highway. I got out of the car to move it off the road, and I felt a lot of sadness when I found this beautiful bird lying on the road. I left the bird’s feathers intact and prayed for its journey home to the spirit world, but I just felt indirectly responsible for requesting a piece of an animal. I didn’t consider the ramifications of how that feather might come to me.

That was coupled by a wave of sadness regarding my humanness, and the implications of what being a human means for the animal world and every habitat around the globe. I felt this beautiful creature didn’t belong here—it should still be soaring majestically, living a full life. The whole situation felt like a lesson in being mindful of how we speak our requests to the universe and how I should have worded my request differently. In the same way that I had not been clear in my wish for a salamander, the same was true for my request for a feather. As a child, I didn’t specify that I wanted to find one alive and well.

When I found the dead hawk along the side of a highway, I became more aware of how that process works, and I realized that I should always include in my prayers that no harm should come to others as a result of my request, whether it be an animal or a human. Then, when we speak our prayers to that universal source and put our requests to the universe, the best practice always involves best-case scenarios and envisioning the highest good for all.

For centuries, our ancestors and humans here before us relied heavily on animals for nourishment. Animals sometimes sacrifice themselves to help feed humans in our physical reality. I think they knew that we needed them in that way, and they would offer themselves to keep us alive because they knew it was for the greater good.

Fortunately, I choose to be a vegetarian in this lifetime, and I try as often as possible to refrain from consuming anything from an animal. I’m fortunate enough that I don’t require an animal to sacrifice its life to sustain mine, and had I been thinking about my request for a feather and if I had taken a step back and considered how that might impact the animal itself, I never would have requested it in the first place.

My goal is to bring forth as much positivity as I can. I want to create as many harm-reduction behaviors as possible and have the highest yield of good energy that I can put into the world. I like to use the example of working within the framework of a scientific model. If we think about ecological footprints and how we impact the world around us, we can see that concept as a continuum. Let’s look at ourselves objectively and from a spiritual perspective. We can transfer that concept to our physical reality and our impact on our environment and the planet. But also look at the emotional footprints we leave behind and those ramifications through our thoughts, words, and actions.

In general terms, we all underestimate the power of our thoughts. Those thoughts reverberate outside of ourselves, creating the dialogue we hear inside our minds that continually shapes our realities and impacts how others treat us. Specifically, this can stem from negative self-talk patterns that shape how we see ourselves, which inevitably affects how others treat us. Often, we learn how we’re supposed to view ourselves by how others treat us, but the goal is to negate or unlearn those patterns to break free of cycles that create harm within ourselves.

It can be a complicated process when we have heard descriptions spoken through the voices of others that do not reflect how we truly feel about ourselves, but that’s part of why we are here. Growth doesn’t happen without pressure from external forces; you can’t advance through the school of life without being challenged along the way. So, once we do this and finally see ourselves as the divine beings that we are, we can help shed ourselves of the weight of inherited trauma untruths about who we are and how we should live, and ultimately help others through dark times. When we can fully live authentically and love ourselves unconditionally, we create a gentleness within ourselves and how we interact with the rest of the world.

It works both ways because even our thoughts about others can impact those around us. There have been times in my life when I’ve interacted with others who didn’t match my vibe, and I’m sure my body language revealed much more than my words did in those instances. Because vibes don’t lie, and even those tiny interactions have meaning and significance and can influence everything around us.

I’m not saying you need to be best friends with everyone because that’s not how it works. Still, in moments of frustration or disagreement, it’s helpful to stop for a moment, take a few soothing breaths, allow your mind to calm itself, and remove that chatter that can distract and make us far more self-involved than we sometimes wish to be.

Ultimately, suppose you’re constantly thinking ill will of others or saying awful things inside your mind; even if you’re talking about yourself, it will carry over to other aspects of your life— regardless of whether you think it does. It will always come back to your relationship with yourself; everything else is just a reflection of your inner world. So, my advice is to be mindful of how you speak to yourself and examine the sources from which your definition of who you are was defined. That way, we can be gentler with ourselves and, by proxy, the world around us.